Don't give up
A few months back, directly following getting feedback from my committee members on my doctoral work, I was ready to quit. I was so mad I could hardly contain myself. They had ripped my work to shreds. I felt at the time that it would be easier to just hit delete on the whole damn thing and just start over. All of the work I had put into my 60 page final report and near the same page count for all of my deliverables, had been torn apart by two people who I had never met, know nothing about me, and I felt didn't really see what I was trying to accomplish.
And then I took a breath. As I do in my life, I talked to people. I reached out to my support system. I journaled my thoughts and feelings. I got real about what was in front of me. I stepped into action. I have learned in life that, life will happen. I can think things are going to turn out one way, and that gets thrown in my face to show me how little control I have in so many ways, shapes, and forms.
I had to own the fact that what I sent really, wasn't that great after all. Sure, it was good, but, it wasn't great either. My chair had told me to hire an editor and I dismissed it as not needed. My chair had told me to always write as if who is reading it will know nothing about what I am trying to achieve; I dismissed it as her just being to picky.
I owned it, I accepted it, I took on the task of making my final work great, not just good enough.
After that happened a really cool thing took place. What might seem a small act of kindness, had a profound effect on me. No surprise with this.....I talk publicly about my life stuff. I have shared about this entire process of earning a doctorate. I had shared about the recent experience on social media. I came to work and a colleague gave me a card that said three simple, but powerful words. Don't give up.
Don't. Give. Up. This, for me, was a testament to the need for a support system in our world. Without the people around me, I couldn't do the things I do. I learned in early recovery to build a support system around me to help keep me moving forward. On any given day if life throws me a curve ball, as life certainly will, I can make a connection with people who will get me through it.
Here is the kicker......you MUST have connections in place on a regular basis with people. I have people I talk to regularly in all areas of my personal and professional worlds. People who know me. They know my hopes and dreams, and my struggles and fears. I have friends, family, and colleagues who know me well. I talk to them regularly. By doing this, when shit hits the fan, me reaching out to them won't seem a monumental thing to do. IF I am not in regular contact with someone, when I really need to talk them, it will be way too hard. But, if I am regularly talking to the people in my world, when I really need to talk them, dialing the number will be a habit and will feel normal.
You are capable of achieving amazing things. You are. You can not tell me any different. Will the things you want to achieve be easy to do, likely not. I have found that most things worth having in life are not the things that are just handed to us. The things that are worth having the most take time, effort, and a willingness to keep pushing forward.
And then I took a breath. As I do in my life, I talked to people. I reached out to my support system. I journaled my thoughts and feelings. I got real about what was in front of me. I stepped into action. I have learned in life that, life will happen. I can think things are going to turn out one way, and that gets thrown in my face to show me how little control I have in so many ways, shapes, and forms.
I had to own the fact that what I sent really, wasn't that great after all. Sure, it was good, but, it wasn't great either. My chair had told me to hire an editor and I dismissed it as not needed. My chair had told me to always write as if who is reading it will know nothing about what I am trying to achieve; I dismissed it as her just being to picky.
I owned it, I accepted it, I took on the task of making my final work great, not just good enough.
After that happened a really cool thing took place. What might seem a small act of kindness, had a profound effect on me. No surprise with this.....I talk publicly about my life stuff. I have shared about this entire process of earning a doctorate. I had shared about the recent experience on social media. I came to work and a colleague gave me a card that said three simple, but powerful words. Don't give up.
Don't. Give. Up. This, for me, was a testament to the need for a support system in our world. Without the people around me, I couldn't do the things I do. I learned in early recovery to build a support system around me to help keep me moving forward. On any given day if life throws me a curve ball, as life certainly will, I can make a connection with people who will get me through it.
Here is the kicker......you MUST have connections in place on a regular basis with people. I have people I talk to regularly in all areas of my personal and professional worlds. People who know me. They know my hopes and dreams, and my struggles and fears. I have friends, family, and colleagues who know me well. I talk to them regularly. By doing this, when shit hits the fan, me reaching out to them won't seem a monumental thing to do. IF I am not in regular contact with someone, when I really need to talk them, it will be way too hard. But, if I am regularly talking to the people in my world, when I really need to talk them, dialing the number will be a habit and will feel normal.
You are capable of achieving amazing things. You are. You can not tell me any different. Will the things you want to achieve be easy to do, likely not. I have found that most things worth having in life are not the things that are just handed to us. The things that are worth having the most take time, effort, and a willingness to keep pushing forward.
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