Financial Health (National Recovery Month)
I distinctly remember my financial health, or really, massive lack of financial health in early recovery. This was a massive mess for me in 1995/96 when I very first started my journey, and then, not so bad, but still a mess again, in 2007 when I had returned to use for a six month period from the fall of 2006 to March of 2007.
I know I am not alone with this memory. For many people, early recovery brings with it massive stress in the area of finances. Massive might even be putting it lightly. I used to carry around my stack of past due bills with me during my every move. This was a large stack of unpaid bills that was in the thousands of dollars. It was like carrying around a 1000 pound weight everywhere I went. I would just see the stack and the stress would hit like a ton of bricks.
I had other bills right in front of me on a daily basis. My court fines, the over 13k in past due child support, paying for UA's that I was required to take, and then....normal stuff. Like eating, paying current rent, current utilities, etc., etc. Just writing this brings it all back and I am shaking my head remembering how painful a time it was.
How did I get through it, and, how did I get to where I am today? Give me just a moment before I tell you how, because I want to tell you about my financial health today.
Today, I own a home, have vehicles in the driveway, ALL of my bills are current, and my credit is solid. I have a retirement savings, and, if we have an emergency and we need money, we can do it.
Wow! It's amazing just writing that. For me, a person in recovery who had the scenario described above, with my former financial nightmare, it is amazing. Nothing short of amazing.
Now, how does a person in recovery with what can really fell like a never ending battle, get from there to here? In one sentence it is a willingness to be patient, keep trying, and believing that little bit by little, your financial health CAN and WILL improve with time.
Get busy working
My first job in early recovery in 1996 was working at a Subway in Sumner, WA. I was a sandwich artist! I had no formal education past the 10th grade at that time. I had work experience prior to my dark and ugly meth days, but in 1996, in my early days of recovery, I had a huge blank spot on my resume with no job history for nearly two years. So, I had to take what I could get. A job, any job. Something to start bringing in an income. I had to swallow my pride and do whatever work I could get to start making even a small dent on the massive debt I had at the the time.
I say to people in early recovery to get busy now. Don't wait to start a job, any job. I worked full time while I was going to Pierce college. Why? Because I had to in able to be where I am today. I had to pay my basic needs, and then, what was left, I started chipping away at my debt.
I would not be where I am today if I hadn't started working in my very early days of recovery. So, I say to you now, in your early days of recovery, get busy! Getting busy working, for me in those early days of recovery, had other positive effects. I had something to focus on rather than just staying in my head. I felt productive and like I was contributing to society. Was it all pretty and fun? Nope. The difficult jobs and times working, built in me a willingness to keep forging ahead to get to a job I wanted, rather, than a job I had to have.
Today, I am in a career I could have never have fathomed years ago. Truly. I am in dream job. And, this dream job, is of my choosing! You can get to where you want to go, IF, you are willing to do the work in early recovery in this area. After my Subway job I landed a job as a cook and did that job for almost two years. I LOVED that job. It provided me a steady income while I forged ahead in my desire to get a college degree. I remember it well and have fond memories of those times.
Budgeting:
The first thing is to learn to budget. I was taught this early on and have had a budget ever since. Learn how to create and manage a budget now, not later. Even when you think you don't have enough money to have budget, you need to know the skill of budgeting. It is vital. Learn about budgeting here: https://www.practicalmoneyskills.com/teach/lesson_plans/college
BEFORE you say you can't do it, actually try it first. I promise you it works. You HAVE to learn money management skills before you get money. Look at all of the research on most who run into massive amounts of money and then lose it quickly. Almost always it is because they didn't know how to manage money prior. It's not magic, it is a skill.
Communication with creditors:
It's scary. Period. I remember calling places I owed money to and having to own up to the fact that I was the one who hadn't paid. I was the one who went off the radar and didn't communicate with the places I owed money too. I had to put aside my pride and call. I had to be willing to be on the receiving end of hearing from those private and public entities that only wanted to see me do one thing....pay my bills.
At first many would not work with me....I had paychecks garnished regularly. I was making minimum wage and having half of my check taken out every payday. But, here is what I learned to do. I would call them and be real. I owned my stuff. I found that when I did that, most entities would at least listen, and many would work with me. Some wouldn't want to work with me until after I made regular payments. Once they were able to see I wasn't full of crap and I was following through, it was almost magical how they changed their attitudes toward me.
One of those places was state child support offices. At first, when I had my first job in recovery, bam, half my check was gone! I called and tried to plead with them to not take half. He wasn't willing because I had gone so long without making any attempt to communicate or pay. I let some time go by, and, I kept in communication, and I kept paying. In about six months, they started to work with me and we set up a reasonable agreement where my son was receiving regular child support, and, I was able to meet my basic needs.
This happened with most of my debts. I made efforts, I stayed consistent, they worked with me. Some didn't, and the reality is, they didn't have too. I had the debt to them, not the other way around. Was it easy, no way. And, in many ways looking back, I am glad it wasn't easy. I learned a lot from it. I pay my bills on time today. I don't want to go back there again.
Credit
I couldn't even get a family member to loan me $20, let alone a business to loan me anything in early recovery. My credit was horrible. Less than horrible. You just read about my mess above.......my credit score was probably a negative number in my early days. Today, we can walk into our credit union and have a loan in about five minutes with very few questions asked. That reality is amazing. Just amazing. And, just like other parts I have written about, it isn't magic or a miracle. It has taken time, discipline, and a willingness to be patient and do the right thing.
Number one. I would say, is to learn how credit works. Just like budgeting it is vital to know how credit works in our society. It is vital knowledge. The same link from above is here again for you to read and learn from: https://www.practicalmoneyskills.com/teach/lesson_plans/college
Many in early recovery have damaged their credit through simple lack of paying bills. My credit report in 1996 was a mess. Throughout my credit report were past due and massively delinquent accounts. I have made the decision twice in my life to file bankruptcy. This is not a decision anyone should make lightly. Having a bankruptcy on your record is not good at all. I was able, in 2007 to not file bankruptcy and repair my credit to the amazing place it is today. Again, educate yourself in this area.
The key thing with credit is to pay your bills on time, don't have credit accounts you don't need, and, don't over extend yourself with credit accounts. Rather than go into a lot of detail outside of what I have written here I will say again, educate yourself. You CAN go from having horrible credit to having great credit. I, and many others like me, have done it.
Willingness to forego immediate gratification
Having the ability to go through my "want or need" process with buying things has been massively helpful to staying within my means financially. I learned this technique years ago and my wife and I use it in our lives today when it comes to spending money. Ask yourself the next time you think you NEED to buy something......is it a want, or, a need? Having the heat in your home in the winter, for sure a need. Having a brand new car in your driveway, a want. Making sure you child has school supplies, a need. You see how to do it. I use to think I HAD to have a lot things. But the reality is, if my basic needs are met, everything else is a want.
If you can take put this mindset into action with your finances, this IS where the real magic will happen. The key with this one is developing a healthy mindset. Yes, in my early days, when I had a lot of debt, my wants were back burner.....didn't happen much. Now, years later, with a healthy financial scenario, I can have more of my wants. BUT, they DON'T happen unless the needs are taken care of first.
For people in recovery, this last area, delaying instant gratification can be tough. I get it, I really do. I have made mistakes along the way. Thinking I HAD to buy this or that, and then, paying for it later by having to scramble pay for needs that I didn't take care of before the wants. Make sure you find people who have a positive financial scenario who have went from craziness to goodness in this area and ask them to mentor you.
IT IS POSSIBLE AND YOU CAN DO IT! I, and many others just like me, have done it.
I know I am not alone with this memory. For many people, early recovery brings with it massive stress in the area of finances. Massive might even be putting it lightly. I used to carry around my stack of past due bills with me during my every move. This was a large stack of unpaid bills that was in the thousands of dollars. It was like carrying around a 1000 pound weight everywhere I went. I would just see the stack and the stress would hit like a ton of bricks.
I had other bills right in front of me on a daily basis. My court fines, the over 13k in past due child support, paying for UA's that I was required to take, and then....normal stuff. Like eating, paying current rent, current utilities, etc., etc. Just writing this brings it all back and I am shaking my head remembering how painful a time it was.
How did I get through it, and, how did I get to where I am today? Give me just a moment before I tell you how, because I want to tell you about my financial health today.
Today, I own a home, have vehicles in the driveway, ALL of my bills are current, and my credit is solid. I have a retirement savings, and, if we have an emergency and we need money, we can do it.
Wow! It's amazing just writing that. For me, a person in recovery who had the scenario described above, with my former financial nightmare, it is amazing. Nothing short of amazing.
Now, how does a person in recovery with what can really fell like a never ending battle, get from there to here? In one sentence it is a willingness to be patient, keep trying, and believing that little bit by little, your financial health CAN and WILL improve with time.
Get busy working
My first job in early recovery in 1996 was working at a Subway in Sumner, WA. I was a sandwich artist! I had no formal education past the 10th grade at that time. I had work experience prior to my dark and ugly meth days, but in 1996, in my early days of recovery, I had a huge blank spot on my resume with no job history for nearly two years. So, I had to take what I could get. A job, any job. Something to start bringing in an income. I had to swallow my pride and do whatever work I could get to start making even a small dent on the massive debt I had at the the time.
I say to people in early recovery to get busy now. Don't wait to start a job, any job. I worked full time while I was going to Pierce college. Why? Because I had to in able to be where I am today. I had to pay my basic needs, and then, what was left, I started chipping away at my debt.
I would not be where I am today if I hadn't started working in my very early days of recovery. So, I say to you now, in your early days of recovery, get busy! Getting busy working, for me in those early days of recovery, had other positive effects. I had something to focus on rather than just staying in my head. I felt productive and like I was contributing to society. Was it all pretty and fun? Nope. The difficult jobs and times working, built in me a willingness to keep forging ahead to get to a job I wanted, rather, than a job I had to have.
Today, I am in a career I could have never have fathomed years ago. Truly. I am in dream job. And, this dream job, is of my choosing! You can get to where you want to go, IF, you are willing to do the work in early recovery in this area. After my Subway job I landed a job as a cook and did that job for almost two years. I LOVED that job. It provided me a steady income while I forged ahead in my desire to get a college degree. I remember it well and have fond memories of those times.
Budgeting:
The first thing is to learn to budget. I was taught this early on and have had a budget ever since. Learn how to create and manage a budget now, not later. Even when you think you don't have enough money to have budget, you need to know the skill of budgeting. It is vital. Learn about budgeting here: https://www.practicalmoneyskills.com/teach/lesson_plans/college
BEFORE you say you can't do it, actually try it first. I promise you it works. You HAVE to learn money management skills before you get money. Look at all of the research on most who run into massive amounts of money and then lose it quickly. Almost always it is because they didn't know how to manage money prior. It's not magic, it is a skill.
Communication with creditors:
It's scary. Period. I remember calling places I owed money to and having to own up to the fact that I was the one who hadn't paid. I was the one who went off the radar and didn't communicate with the places I owed money too. I had to put aside my pride and call. I had to be willing to be on the receiving end of hearing from those private and public entities that only wanted to see me do one thing....pay my bills.
At first many would not work with me....I had paychecks garnished regularly. I was making minimum wage and having half of my check taken out every payday. But, here is what I learned to do. I would call them and be real. I owned my stuff. I found that when I did that, most entities would at least listen, and many would work with me. Some wouldn't want to work with me until after I made regular payments. Once they were able to see I wasn't full of crap and I was following through, it was almost magical how they changed their attitudes toward me.
One of those places was state child support offices. At first, when I had my first job in recovery, bam, half my check was gone! I called and tried to plead with them to not take half. He wasn't willing because I had gone so long without making any attempt to communicate or pay. I let some time go by, and, I kept in communication, and I kept paying. In about six months, they started to work with me and we set up a reasonable agreement where my son was receiving regular child support, and, I was able to meet my basic needs.
This happened with most of my debts. I made efforts, I stayed consistent, they worked with me. Some didn't, and the reality is, they didn't have too. I had the debt to them, not the other way around. Was it easy, no way. And, in many ways looking back, I am glad it wasn't easy. I learned a lot from it. I pay my bills on time today. I don't want to go back there again.
Credit
I couldn't even get a family member to loan me $20, let alone a business to loan me anything in early recovery. My credit was horrible. Less than horrible. You just read about my mess above.......my credit score was probably a negative number in my early days. Today, we can walk into our credit union and have a loan in about five minutes with very few questions asked. That reality is amazing. Just amazing. And, just like other parts I have written about, it isn't magic or a miracle. It has taken time, discipline, and a willingness to be patient and do the right thing.
Number one. I would say, is to learn how credit works. Just like budgeting it is vital to know how credit works in our society. It is vital knowledge. The same link from above is here again for you to read and learn from: https://www.practicalmoneyskills.com/teach/lesson_plans/college
Many in early recovery have damaged their credit through simple lack of paying bills. My credit report in 1996 was a mess. Throughout my credit report were past due and massively delinquent accounts. I have made the decision twice in my life to file bankruptcy. This is not a decision anyone should make lightly. Having a bankruptcy on your record is not good at all. I was able, in 2007 to not file bankruptcy and repair my credit to the amazing place it is today. Again, educate yourself in this area.
The key thing with credit is to pay your bills on time, don't have credit accounts you don't need, and, don't over extend yourself with credit accounts. Rather than go into a lot of detail outside of what I have written here I will say again, educate yourself. You CAN go from having horrible credit to having great credit. I, and many others like me, have done it.
Willingness to forego immediate gratification
Having the ability to go through my "want or need" process with buying things has been massively helpful to staying within my means financially. I learned this technique years ago and my wife and I use it in our lives today when it comes to spending money. Ask yourself the next time you think you NEED to buy something......is it a want, or, a need? Having the heat in your home in the winter, for sure a need. Having a brand new car in your driveway, a want. Making sure you child has school supplies, a need. You see how to do it. I use to think I HAD to have a lot things. But the reality is, if my basic needs are met, everything else is a want.
If you can take put this mindset into action with your finances, this IS where the real magic will happen. The key with this one is developing a healthy mindset. Yes, in my early days, when I had a lot of debt, my wants were back burner.....didn't happen much. Now, years later, with a healthy financial scenario, I can have more of my wants. BUT, they DON'T happen unless the needs are taken care of first.
For people in recovery, this last area, delaying instant gratification can be tough. I get it, I really do. I have made mistakes along the way. Thinking I HAD to buy this or that, and then, paying for it later by having to scramble pay for needs that I didn't take care of before the wants. Make sure you find people who have a positive financial scenario who have went from craziness to goodness in this area and ask them to mentor you.
IT IS POSSIBLE AND YOU CAN DO IT! I, and many others just like me, have done it.
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